Yesterday my husband, Alex, flew to Alaska. I kissed him and said good bye. Our last kiss for four weeks. I miss him in waves. He really has not been gone long enough to really miss him, but I know he is gone and this is hard.
I tried to keep busy all day and not think about how alone I was going to be for the next few weeks. When I came home from work I was like a woman possessed I cleaned and cleaned the almost clean house until Izzi called about us going out. We first looked at puppies and kittens. Then we gorged ourselves on Sushi. I was saddened when I had a split second thought of texting Alex to see if he needed anything for me to bring home.
Home was quiet. I watched T.V. until I was so tired I was about to pass out. I woke up around four in the morning like I always do when he is not in bed with me. I hugged his pillow close and drifted back to sleep. I woke up to Zoey snuggling with me and wished (not for the first time) that there was a tiny us.
Then I remembered that I had this blog waiting for my someday. Why not start that today. Start chronicling my journey to possible motherhood. Today I’ve continued my keeping busy to not think about Alex being gone. I finished one of my library book.
I took care of a couple of life things that needed my attention. Now, as I write this I’m watching an episode of Parenthood and contemplating a walk in the sunshine. Since I been living in the Pacific Northwest for almost two years I am vitamin D deficient and should always take advantage of all the sunny days. I have to get myself healthy in order to conceive someday.
Have an Amazing Saturday,
Future Mama Redmond